Bigfoot

During my trip to Alaska, I cruised the Anchorage Borders Bookshop to find something to read on the flight home. I picked up a magazine I had never seen before by the name of Skeptical Inquirer. The magazine bills itself as the magazine "for Science and Reason" and the reason it caught my eye was the following cover blurb: 1967 Bigfoot Film Hoax Exposed. I just had to pick it up.

The article was pretty interesting. It was an excerpt from an upcoming book that debunks the famous 1967 "Patterson" film. It goes into the hoax step-by-step and interviews various people involved, either overtly or inadvertently, who "reveal" the truth.

(The Patterson film is a short-film/home movie made in 1967. While out on his horse in Bluff Creek, California, a man named Roger Patterson filmed a mysterious, large, man-like creature walking through a clearing and on into the woods. Patterson always claimed it was a Sasquatch. If you have ever seen a TV documentary about Bigfoot, odds are it ran the Patterson film; it was quite a staple for that kind of a show. The authenticity of his film has been debated for years and years. That it is truly a hoax has been revealed only recently.)

Now I have seen the Patterson film several times--and it is downright creepy. Creeps me out every time. I always thought it was great proof that yes, there are things out there that defy explanation, hidden away from the all-seeing eyes of man.

I have always been intrigued and interested by Bigfoot. I couldn't tell you definitively how I got hooked on him, but it was probably seeing the Patterson film when I was a kid on a TV show about monsters or something. I read nearly every book my neighborhood library had on the topic.

I remember one night in the summer of 1975 when I scared myself so badly.

We were in Austin, Minnesota visiting my maternal grandparents. I was 10. I was out playing with Brian H. Brian was a boy who lived in Austin, just a block away from my grandparents. I always saw him whenever we visited Austin. He was a year or 2 older than me, but always we got along well and he seemed to like having me around. Anyway, Brian invited me to go see a movie that night and Mom and Dad let me go. The movie was The Mysterious Monsters, a sensationalistic documentary about Bigfoot, The Abominable Snowman, and The Loch Ness Monster.

I actually remember very little about the movie except for one scene. The narrator described a night that a couple at home had when they encountered Bigfoot. On screen the actors (or quite possibly, the couple themselves) acted out the event. They were sitting home one summer evening, reading or watching TV when they heard mysterious noises out in their yard. A shadow flickered past a window. The wife was scared but the husband decided to go out and check things out. (Here it comes) He opens the front door...and standing there is a brown-orange ape-like creature.

I screamed. I actually screamed in fright. And so did other audience members. It scared the crap out of me! I know it was just some stunt-man in an orangutan costume or something, but it was effective enough to freak me out then.

I'm sure if I were to see this movie today, the effect would be less and probably look very poor-quality. But for a highly-imaginative 10-year-old!

Anyway, after the screaming died down, there was quite a bit of laughter; people laughing at the screamers and I'm sure the screamers laughing at themselves. I think Brian nudged me or gave me a "What are you yelling about?" look. After the movie let out I am sure I tried to present the front to Brian that I hadn't been scared at all and I still wasn't. No sir. Not scared at all. No way.

So...we returned to Grandma & Grandpa's. Brian went home and I was packed off to bed. I was sleeping in Uncle Jackie's room on the second floor. Need I admit that I did not sleep one minute that night? I knew that Bigfoot was outside the window, looking in at me, waiting for the right moment when I would look out and see him and he would get me.

Oh, I knew that I was at least 20 feet off the ground. I knew that Bigfoot had never been sighted in Minnesota. I knew that it was the height of summer and that I was sweating like a pig, hiding underneath all the sheets. I knew that in the movie it was just a guy in a monkey suit. I also knew that Bigfoot was right outside the window, looking in at me, waiting for the right moment when I looked out and saw him and he would get me. I was that scared. I couldn't even call out to Uncle Jackie sleeping in the other bed on the other side of the room.

It was amazing how that movie affected me. For years afterwards, when I would go XC skiing in the field behind our house in Duluth, I never stayed out long because I would remember that movie and suddenly be sure that Sasquatch was somewhere behind me, following me on the ski trails.

These days, I have outgrown that fear. Mostly.

So I read the Skeptical Inquirer article with interest, and not just a little hint of sadness. Call me a romantic ("Romantic!"), but I still like to believe that Bigfoot is out there. An unexplained, unknown, rarely seen part of our world. I suppose Patterson wanted to put one over on the believers and maybe make a name for himself or something, exploiting a myth.

My highly-imaginative 10-year-old self still believes.